New hairs, news, & new gigs

Red hair dye is great and all...but my one gripe is that it fades all too quickly. After the {failed!} attempt at going blonde, my hair has had particular difficulties holding onto color, but I thought perhaps a nice purple-y hue would look nice?

I'm partial to my red color family, and found one with a supposed darker purplish base. The color was lovely, albeit....well....

My boss asked if it was supposed to be that....pink. I was diggin' it and, quite frankly, was just glad it wasn't the weird color going on, albeit it almost embodied that trendy rose gold color scheme that is so popular and I received several compliments for my accidental locks.

In other news....I have joined the Teen Hearts Modeling family...and loving this cozy long tee! Guess I can add that to the résumé?

Loki dear is continuing his campaign of mischief and snuggles. Mr. Loki was tickled pink on being spoiled from his grandfurmummy, who loaded me up with ham and turkey and goodies for this growing fur baby. She may not have met him yet, but is already smitten.

He's a cutie....and a terror. Goodness, I love him unconditionally, though, even when he wakes me up at 5AM for sh!ts and giggles.

Home all of an hour or so and he's already on the time-out shoulder.

When Loki was a kitten and would start acting up or getting into things he shouldn't {imagine that!}, I would throw him over my shoulder to calm him down while I got ready, one-handed. He's knows I love him but mean business when he's over the shoulder as so.

Fur baby had surgery to remove his front claws....I cried. While I don't believe in essentially handicapping kitties, my overly rambunctious kitten was destructive to many things and has since calmed down...

He received SO. MUCH. LOVE. and snuggles during recovery. We took many naps when I could spare the time before and after work. Snuggle bug was reassured he wasn't in trouble, but that it was for the better and more peaceful living. Little stinker can now have full reign of the apartment {aside from my sissy's room since she'd go into allergic shock if he was too deep into her business.....}

So....this picture...I caved. I chopped my long talons off.

Yeah, I purchased the iPhone 7. It's okay, but my nails are doing well now. The one painfully ripped off.

I'll be living off of eggs and ramen as I pay for phone, two trips coming up, and bills. wooooooo

Adulting.

Happy late turkey lurkey day!

xxx

Job Hunting for the Work Fanatics

September has proven another busy month with the continuation of my MBA degree in term II. Managerial Accounting and Business Analytics are not as terrifying and intimidating as I had first thought, especially after taking the prerequisite module for Business Analytics {I barely passed, which is embarrassing to say}.

Working full-time plus part-time while studying and actively seeking new employment is mentally draining, but you have to be willing to put in the time and effort in order to reap the rewards. Stagnation is not an option for career development and goal-seekers.

Crazy times have meant time for a new 'do to change things up just a tad.

Through my experience in the interviewing and hiring process at work, as well as personal experience with current job-hunting and browsing for tips become evident how crucial one's résumé is for simply getting through the door - it's often the first presentation of who you are and what you can do.

• Résumé Etiquette: Do's and Don't's
• The Perfect Résumé: What You Need to Know to Have One
• Résumé Etiquette: Do's & Don't's for a Modern Résumé

And don't forget to ask questions back - the interview is just about seeing if you are a good fit for that particular employee as you are as a potential employee for that company.

• 10 Interview Questions You Should Ask

Or, you could be like this guy to stand out among the ranks. Everyone needs their own Key Strategic Differentiator {KSD}; it seems like a 4-year degree won't cut it anymore, and so, it's up to the individual to figure out how to shine {and continue to do so once they've been offered, and accepted, the position}.

It can be a bit daunting at times, no joke...

Amidst the chaos of finding my KSD, luckily I have the sweet chickadees at home to provide plenty of snuggles and stress relief. There have been scientific studies granting evidence to lower stress levels and elevated happiness for pet owners. Kittens are certainly gifted at sharing the love.

xxxx

Support Squad

Taking on the tribulations of the world alone is something not even Batman can do - he has the help of cheeky Alfred to keep him grounded and the Batmobile well maintained.

I'm thankful for the love and support of friends and family by my side who are there to celebrate the moments that need celebrated, grieve in times of mourning, offer a listening ear and wise words, and kick my a$$ when they suspect my path turning dark.

Mummy sent some goodies to feed my belly, Thank You notes for future interviews, goodies for Superman, and of course, it was all packed neatly into Loki and Athena's new jungle gym.

After being in a fog, mind befuddled by the effort of tryiing not to drown in the inept feelings I had of myself and the seemingly impossibly large bite of life I was attempting to chew and swallow, being challenged by a person in authority was potentially the shock I needed to shake me to my senses.

Depression hurts. Mentally, physically, emotionally. The one depressed is not the only one affected, but the ones surrounding the afflicted can be the catalysts of change, offering their kind hearts to help build the ladder out of the hole. Granted, it will take time, but it's time I'm willing to invest for happiness.

The BBL {Big Boss Lady} is back. For my fellow BBL's, enjoy a few laughs from this "advice" comic for women leadership then continue to do what you do best: kicking butt and paving the way for the next wave of women leaders.

While we can't remove all of the negativity from our lives, little changes will quickly add up. Looking at the bigger picture is opening my eyes again. I can do this.

• 8/18 - bought my last Monster and it's been in the fridge ever since
• 8/24 - back on the LoseIt! App to hold myself accountable
• Ordered my first regimen of Rodan + Fields unblemish

New hair always ensures a mood boost and this darker, Merlot-colored mop is signifying a new beginning for my psyche.

While I'm not completely depriving myself of the "bad" stuff, aka the finer things in life, everything in moderation is going to be a new mantra, something with which I've had issues before. Finding ways to enjoy yummy beer while regaining that happy little 6-pack I used to have and of which I have only been able to maintain about a 1/3...

Cheers to the little happies in the world and the small changes to continuous improvement {business terms applying themselves to life}. And here's to completing my first term of MBA courses! 10 courses to go!

And, as always, my sidekicks keep me company while I try to figure out the puzzle of life.

xxxx

Matters of the foolish heart

"Love was just like communism: it was a great idea but never quite worked out."
-Conrad Valmont, The Longest Week

My inner 13yo self, angst-ridden and driven by pessimism battles the inner whimsical romantic who half believes she'll grow old with someone and be as cute as the couple holding hands and smiling in the hospital room the other day, giggling like two silly lovebirds.... Okay, I'm actually smiling just thinking about them and the years they must have spent together, the life they built around one another, a beautiful thing indeed in my fantastical overactive imagination *sigh*

As I have witnessed through experience and vicariously through friends, those wondrously soaring feelings, unstable and unpredictable can swiftly kick us in the teeth, back down to where we belong - slightly bruised and achy, and sometimes the worst for wear.

It's always interesting what one is willing to do in order to catch, and hold onto, the attention of a crush/someone we like/a significant other, the various types merely lumped together as it can be quite comparable, however different in degree for the lengths to which one will go to show how much they care - and because someone wants to put forth the effort.

It's easy to lie in my cozy double-bed alone, hogging all of the covers to myself, to denounce love and its potential, but in truth, I'm quite at odds at this strange notion. I see beautiful couples grow old together, listen to stories of family friends who have been together since WWII, observe the love on FB of those of our generation looking to break the mold of this gen's tendency to break and buy new rather than mend, and the biggest shit-grin spreads across my now-aching smiling chubby cheeks.

I feel it's more of a battle of trying to rationalize feelings which simply cannot be rationalized...there are specific attributes we may like about someone, but there's a spark that makes us {going back to middle school now} like like someone, and not just like them as we may like someone with a similar sense of style or character or eyes which light up the room or muscles with just the right mixture of strength and lithe...merdé.

There is hope and I hope....for others. Sure, I'm going to listen to those gut-wrenching, sickly sweet love songs and get puppy eyes, wait up all night just for the chance to talk on the phone after a long day, but as far as longevity, of this I'm sure: if I do end up alone, as likely to occur, I'll be okay.

The irony: the heart and brain are seemingly opposites {not opponents}, yet it is the brain creating these fuzzy-warm feelings. Why do you hide behind the guise of the heart, brain?

Like/love is not a bad thing, but one which can be torturous...but that's why there is chocolate and stuffed hippos to cry on and wonderful girl friends to Snapchat when a guy or girl is being a butthead.

Be happy, be merry, fall in love....and have a healthy supply of chocolate waiting atop a stack of books in which to dive at the first sign there is need of retreat, but also be willing to let down your long hair, Rapunzel, to let someone climb the metaphorical tower wall of the prison in which you've encased yourself...

....and jumpers*: invest in jumpers so you can keep yourself warm when that male heater isn't around. 

*sweaters

On Tattoos and Piercings

I'm sorry, Mama,
I never meant to hurt you.
I never meant to make you cry,
but tonight, I'm cleaning out my closet.

Airing out the cobwebs of thoughts swirling in my mind, particularly when it comes to body modification aka ink and steel {tattoos and piercings}.

My Mum was none too thrilled when she saw the lovely e.e.cummings quote on my leg the day of uni graduation, but has come to understand hoc est corpus mium {this is my body}.

i carry your heart

(i carry it in my heart)

These beautiful lines hold a special place in my heart...those who are gone are never truly gone, tucked away in little crevices of our hearts where their memories lingers on long after their last breath.

I think of my Pop Pop and Grammie and the wondrous people who have passed on, as well as old friends whom I used to love from the bottom depths of my soul, with whom I no longer have much connection at all.

There's a certain taboo that tattoos are gawdy pieces of art displayed on the skin... like people, these permanent pieces of art can be big, small, realistic, stylized, colored, b&w....

The possibilities are endless. Ink requires quite the commitment {or the bank for future removal} so I can see why it is a big deal. However, it's also a form of expression or a means of beautifying one's body with significant symbols and words.

A cheeky little R2-D2 hides on my left hip, a comic-style homage to the fantastical world of droids and hyperspace.

While there are certain tattoo "fads" which come and go from time to time {mini mustaches from 2013 ring a bell?}, awareness for cancer and illness goes beyond what it is "in."

I love the message the semicolon conveys: an author inserts a semicolon when (s)he could have ended a sentence.

It's a continuance, holding on to an idea which could have so easily ended. In this, it is a sign of hope for those battling mental illness. A little reminder to myself that it's okay to seek help as friends have reached out to me in their times of need, I, too, can reach out to them when things just don't seem to be going well.

This semicolon represents my fight song.

Ka-Pow! Showing those negative inner voices who is boss in this world of chaos and pressures of perfection.

Messy hair, don't care

Oh! and my latest beauty... Easily shoved up my nose for work {have to remain professional when&where it counts}, loving my new septum piercing.

Sorry, Mummy.

A dainty little piercing....if you want to be a badass and have piercings all over, do you, honey. If that's your look, work it.

I only wish to provide a different facet to piercings and ink - people do them for various reasons and they can work for different looks!

When you see someone inked and pierced, don't judge. You don't know their story nor the significance of those beautiful images on their body. If you're part of the club, don't let the haters hate {might want to adhere to any dress codes for work to avoid confrontation...}.

We work to live, not live to work, so stay within the work parameters for those few hours on the work grind, but outside, be comfortable in your skin.

Time to clean and tuck the septum ring before work :)

Party of 1 in Loserville

One seems to be the typical number of heads in the parties I attend anymore. By party, I mean dancing in my dreams as I attempt to catch up on much needed sleep in order to combat this sleep deprived body fueled by Monster and Rockstar.

I comfort myself into thinking they're not all that bad as they are sugar-free, but it's only a matter of time before my body catches on and refuses to accept this substitute for a full night's amount of rest.

Tree leaves in only a few short days before he embarks on a journey with his band to magical faerylands [I don't like the modernized "fairy" spelling]. For more details on the talented hotties, visit here, here, or here. In all honesty, the band is leaving soon and as ecstatic I am for them and as wonderfully life-altering this band tour may prove to be, I'm still going to be a supportive yet slightly saddened...

On the plus side, I'm likely to be accumulating significant overtime so perfect timing! Win-win: keeping busy, making money whilst doing so, and keeping my mind preoccupied whilst the Tree is wooing crowds and shaking his beautiful rump on various stages around the East Coast.

I've been a lame-o in the sense that I've hardly traveled and June is nearly depleted, but I have a few trips up my sleeve, just you wait. Oh! and I've spent some quality time with kittens too cute for their own good...

Sleep, snuggles, work, and reading. How I spend my days anymore.

Jax being a perfect little cuddly tease.

Max making my maladies feel alllll better with tummy rubs.

Jax: at least I look good for this selfie.

Duality of emergence

The emergence into adulthood...that split between the college "adult" and a loan-paying, responsible, hopefully employed "adult."

As I walked to my car in the enormous hospital parking garage, contemplating life so as to keep my mind distracted from thinking about the possibility of being abducted or gang-banged, inner concepts of this whole "adult life" flooded the slideshow of my mind, a high-speed Prezi presentation.

New locks.
Ba-bye, light brown faded hair

 This time period is a crazy transition. I've been out of school, hell, 6 months now, and I still feel in limbo: that kick-ass Operations Coordinator for the second largest account in a national company vs. that bewildered 20-yr young woman who still sleeps with two very faithful stuffed animals and cries during Big Hero 6 and Up.

Professional-ish look

It's crazy to think I'm an adult now....whoa. I don't even like toast. Or rather, I like warm bread just on the verge of the tiniest bit of *crunch* to it.

Mango chutney: found at Wegman's, much to my delight.

Typical shopping bag for this recycling fiend?

Cleaning supplies, toothpaste, a little bit of food, and hair dye. All of the essentials.

I have found the T-storm survival kit on my adventures after work!

An old friend, McKenzie's Black Cherry, is packed away, along with some new friends: Original Hard Cider, Green Apple, and Lazy Lemon [McKenzie's Choice]

I've been on a Summer Shandy kick, so the Lazy Lemon definitely hits the spot.

Even if you're a macho-man beer drinker aka you think you're the bee's knees because you drink piss Corona, McKenzie's is a delightful change of taste for one's tastebuds!

You make me say, oh a-oh oh, a-oh oh oh oh!

Mezzo: Cola küsst orange aka Cola & orange mixed soda from Deutschland.

Sadly, a few cookies has become an acceptable meal for me in recent weeks, albeit the soda was a rare occasion.

Avocados mmmmm. I feel so grownup now!

Okay, I just like the taste and am definitely not cool [or I guess, not cool] enough to just like them for a fad. They're pretty dang delicious and they make a great face when paired with a banana in a bowl.

I'll be a real hipster when I eat kale, but for now, my less-refined self shall divulge in spinach or the lowly and nearly-forgotten lettuce.

Family portrait of this evening's guests....okay, maybe I'm just endorsing McKenzie's yet again because I find it so crisp and delish on my tongue. The fancy, cheap 12-bottle fun pack comes with 4 delectable flavors to meet the needs of many fickle friends!

Off to enjoy an ice-cold bottle and plow through some more of my library books. Currently reading If I Stay at the moment before divulging into Beautiful Darkness.

I shall leave you with this beauty....not because I'm heartless, but because good riddance to any jackass poaching creatures.

Animal Kingdom 1
Jackasses of the world 0

This, my friends, does not begin to tip the scale of inhumane injustice by any means, but small victories are still wins.

We ain't nothin' without friends, toots.

If April showers bring May flowers, then what do we get out of March?

Bling and braids - nice touches for work attire to jazz up my blue button-down.
March means spring which dictates brighter clothing, if not for the season, then to break up the monotony of the dulcet tones of dirty snow....

This lovely green dress makes me feel oh-so-grown up! Channeling a sliver of Jackie-O with the structure of the below-the-knee shift shape, a hint of a modern milkmaid with the braids, a dash of Cara Delevingne's bold brows, and maybe a blend of my inner stoic and pensive self... Perhaps this is what I was telling myself at the time as I lay exhausted for a moment before journaling.

Journaling is my little break from the world. There's something truly magical about physically taking pen to paper to preserve my thoughts and memories...

In this moment, I felt good about myself, powerful, on top of the world as I finally began to see my body in another light. March was a month of storms of the snowy elements and within my mind. The weight loss has been a journey as I yo-yoed with the added weight that began to tack on during my sophomore year of college.

While I feel much better after sweating my ass off [literally] definitely boosted my abysmally low self-esteem in regard to my body image, it's not about being stick thin, thick, bootilicious, boobilicious, or any variation, it's about being comfortable in your own skin. I do full-heartedly believe often the acceptance of unhealthy bodies at either spectrum can be just as damaging as shaming, wanting to improve oneself is certainly not a bad thing.

Treat yo'self. Motto of my new "dieting," which could hardly be called a diet. Spinach, tomato, and cheese omelette with barbecue sauce, Redd's strawberry ale, and French films make for an excellent balance of health and indulgence.

I've struggled with my self-control of my body and in order to reasonably obtain and maintain my goals, total deprivation is not an option.

Mum jeans. Total Mum jeans of which my Mum totally approved. Though not a goal, my legs are finally having a thigh gap carved out of them, something I had not seen since I was in single digits. More importantly, I went up a size for extra room even though they are now rather loose, a few short weeks later. This moment, this crucial moment, was rather profound for me in a way others struggling with their body image may understand...

Hellooooo, twinsie. This beauty parked next to me at Houlihan's. If you've viewed previous posts, this makes me a bit weak between the geeky knees...
My car has Chewie, Han, Leia, and Luke on the back and Vader hanging out on my driver's window.

So happy I was able to visit with my friends for their band's album release!
Friends, no matter how frequent or infrequent you see them, are one of the cruxes of life. They hold us together when times get hectic, hold our hand when we cry, and our hair when we're sick with a stomach bug. Of course, there are the [hopefully] many, many happy times with them ^_^

It's nice knowing these wonderful people have my back. They're also talented as heck!

Crappy weather spent with incredible people helps make the winter blues seem less severe. A nice transitional time into April....which included, sadly, a layoff from my big kid job. And so it begins: my time of official unemployment...

And so it goes...

Murder Mystery @Bube's Brewery
Do NOT touch things you aren't supposed to...whoops

Just like that, the end of an era has crept up. No longer am I a student at XYZ.
Life, man.

It's been a good run, though. Interview in, much fun had in the past 3 1/2 years. Not too much complaining, except that I never did run through the fountain as was on my XYZ student bucket list! I did, however, make a hike over to see the Blue Lagoon, followed by Big Hero 6 at the new revamped cinema that features plush, leather recliners as seats and relatively inexpensive prices!

I have a job. That's scary bananas. I interviewed at two places, but having found out the first was commission-based, eh....no, thank you, good day. The second replied after 3 hours and just like that, I was employed the week after graduating.

The last of the purple locks...

I feel in limbo, however. I technically graduated December 20 and my diploma shall be coming in the mail in a few weeks, yet I have not walked yet, as XYZ only has one ceremony - in the spring. No matter, no matter... I'm walking for my friends and family, and so my Mummy can have pictures to remember this day.

No more Latin, Italian, Spanish, or Global Politics homework....no more handbells practice. First and Last Christmas at the Valley concert. I'm an old Magna Cum Laude fart.

Onto a new chapter...as a brunette this time.

I'm Feeling 22

It's been some time...

I've seen the world (a total of 10% according to Trip Advisor) and yet I've only begun to etch at the surface of the world, stomping down on such an insignificant amount of land in the scheme of things.

I traversed to Paris, alone, full of joy and the utmost lustiness of the vivacious hunger which one may find difficult to understand but for those most stricken with the wanderlust fever. That was how I spent my 21st birthday. Waking up to four men in my hostel that morning was quite the experience...

I was in four countries in roughly 15 hours...Leaving London behind in the morning to see the White Cliffs of Dover before taking the ferry to Calais, France...through Belgium...onto Amsterdam in the Netherlands, taking in sights, giggling and suddenly being transported back to those shy middle school days when friends and I walked among the Red Light District. It was as though the antiquated taboo of females and sex was on my mind; I felt shy for once in a great while.

I saw Bath, Oxford, Edinburgh, the Highlands, Edam, Volendam, Greenwich, Versailles, Wimbledon, and trudged all around London, taking in the sights, falling so miserably in love with the city...until that day arrived. I had to return and devastation took hold. Lovely picked me up and I cried at the sight of him...my former sweetheart picked me up and it was like I had never left, yet I was not who I was.

15lbs heavier from the food (nachos and haggis, mate), delicious beers and ciders, chocolate, and the sorrow of leaving the place which felt like home. One day...I shall return...

Days before returning to university, I was in a wreck which totaled my car and scarred me with a reminder of how sudden death may come. True, my initial thoughts were: Mum is going to kill me. The next thing to cross my mind was: I am going to die.

10 months later (and almost 20lbs lighter than when I left the country)....Lovely and I are no longer together, but remain friends. I've now been to Canada to see Niagara Falls; Winterthur, Gettysburg, Harper's Ferry; several battlefields, a tour through the New England states (16 total states visited and on my way to seeing all 48 continental by the time I'm 30); and met so many wonderful people.

My hair has gone from red to fading red to blonde to purple. I'm ready for the next adventure in life. Less than 5 weeks before graduation.

Hobey Ho, let's go.